21st century friendship poem

So I stole this of my mom's friend's blog since I thought it was awesome here it is:
Are you tired of those sissy 'friendship' poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of True Friendship. You WON'T see cutesy little smiley faces here. Just the stone cold truth of our great friendship.

1. When you are sad, I will jump on the person who made you sad like a spider monkey jacked up on Mountain Dew!!!
2. When you are blue, I will take you out and we will paint the town red.
3. When you smile, I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in.
4. When you're scared, we will high tail it out of here.
5. When you are worried, I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining, ya big baby!!!!
6. When you are confused, I will use little words.
7. When you are sick, stay away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall, I'll pick you up and dust you off...after I laugh my head off!!
9. This is my oath... I pledge it to the end. 'Why?' you may ask; because you are my FRIEND!